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A little bit about my least favorite subject ... Me

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By James Roberts

I get these e-mailed quizzes from time to time. I always hit the delete button without even looking at them. But not this time.

The point of a column is to give our readers a little insight into how our minds work. What better way to do that than with a quiz? Allow me to apologize for some of my answers in advance.

1. Were you named after anyone? My father, James, and my grandfather Ray.

2. When was the last time you cried? Real men don't cry. So, probably five minutes ago.

3. Do you like your handwriting? Yes, because only I can read it.

4. Do you have kids? Yes, a four-legged kid named Charlie.

5. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? No way! That guy's a loser!

6. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Uh ... duh.

7. Do you still have your tonsils? Yes. And that's a strange question.

8. Would you bungee jump? Depends on my state of mind at the time.

9. What is your favorite cereal? I was going to lie and say something like Raisin Bran, but it's really Frankenberry.

10. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? No. What's the point? I'd just have to retie them when I put 'em back on.

11. Favorite ice cream? Mint chocolate chip or strawberry cheesecake.

12. What is the first thing you notice about people? Facial expression. It lets me know whether to expect a punch in the face or a handshake.

13. What is the least favorite thing about yourself? All of the parts between the top of my head and the bottoms of my feet.

14. Who do you miss the most? My dad.

15. What was the last thing you ate? Scrambled eggs, sausage and hash browns.

16. What are you listening to right now? "Can't Hardly Wait" by the Replacements.

17. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Burnt Sienna. I don't know why.

18. Favorite smells? Anything my wife is cooking.

19. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? My mom.

20. Favorite food? Anything Mexican or Italian.

21. Scary movies or happy endings? Scary movies.

22. Last movie you watched? "Martyrs." I recommend avoiding it.

23. Hugs or kisses? Gimme some sugar, baby!

24. Favorite dessert? Cheesecake or anything made with real fruit.

25. What book are you reading now? "Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire."

26. Rolling Stones or Beatles? Rolling Stones! The Beatles are way overrated.

27. What is the farthest you have been from home? Needles, Calif.

28. Where were you born? Frankfort, Ky.

By the way, do you know how difficult it is to come up with column material on a regular basis?